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Sunday, January 24, 2016

American Dream

This is a very mainstream dream, which I do not catergorise it as something easy to achieve.

Some background story about this post. Lately the suspension of the prominent JPA (Public Service Department) scholarship has aroused controversy. People reprimand the government for the injustice that the scholars faced, providing elaboration on the last-minute information, the hope-given-then-scattered condition, opportunity cost paid for the promised-yet-did-not-happen scholarship, limited leeway, the so-called "lies". Some people counter these opinions with reasons like "scholarship is a privilege, not a right", "getting good grades ain't mean that you can have scholarship dropping on you lap" etc.

As one of the scholars, or the victims, I actually do think that the views from both sides make sense. It is not right for the government to give such short notice for people to find alternative. Application closed (universities applied are based on the list that they gave, I would have applied for other schools if there is no JPA scholarship), less than 4 months away from my graduation.

Most importantly, we need time to adjust ourselves, in terms of our focus, our mindset and our plannings. Spending 2 years thinking of utilizing my time when I'm in US universities, I am not that strong to accept the truth of not being able to enter a top notch university, mingle with incredible souls from all around the world, indulge myself in the liberal and holistic learning environment and enjoy the opportunities and resources I could get from the western college. So many plans laid ahead. Network, startups, knowledge, experience. How on earth can Sunway grant me those opportunities?

Almost one week past but I still can imagine myself studying in the local institutes. To be frank, I think I sort of developed some ego in these 2 years, that I deserve something better than a boring and ordinary university live. I need a bigger platform. Malaysian colleges are just too Asian and lack of resources and quality (if you compare with the US ones, which is what I've been doing for thepast 20 months).

I do not know what to expect. According to my experience of being a Malaysian for 20 years, the government will not change their agenda because of us. #WelcometoMalaysia

Can I get a scholarship from Maybank or Shell or Khazanah? Though I'm confident that my CV will catch some attention, but 0.06% of getting daunted me.
Can I get an awesome offer from UCLA or UCB? I do not know. I just think that I'm never a very extraordinary achiever.

What shall I do? Hope for the best? No, that's stupid.
I'm trying very hard to have faith on myself and to believe that I'm capable enough to earn myself the education fund, join the great college and become someone who is remarkable by the global society. At the same time, I'm preparing myself for the bad news, and brainwashing myself that studying locally will not bring me too far away from my dream of being one of the 30 Under 30.

If I would have been lucky enough to go to California, I will fight all my way to do great things, bring pride to my country and my family.

If I'm fated to stay in Malaysia, I will fight all my way to do great things, and to go to Harvard Business School.